I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
home. puking in laundry basket.
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
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