lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
Randomize
