mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize