I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
Never write on a napkin "my face, your boobs" with your phone number and give it to a girl. Just a tip of the day from my nightly experiences lol.
We need to hang out more often
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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