Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
