Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
NEW RULE: can't hook up with more than 50% of the groomsmen in wedding party or it becomes wrong kind of weird. NUMBERS GAME.
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Randomize
