I want to stick my p in your. b.
he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
id be glad to
I thought I was riding a bike, but I guess it was a vacuum cleaner
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
You were trust falling into bushes
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
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