Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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