I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
How drunk are you?
Completed.
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
Randomize
