The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
I can feel your judgement through the phone
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
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