fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
Randomize
