Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
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