Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
Randomize
