he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
Randomize
