I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
