i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
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