it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
got in a fight at the bar because some dude thought i was being sarcastic when i told him "sweet mustache". it really was a sweet mustache
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
Randomize
