do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
Randomize
