Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
Just so you know, my new pet parrot tried to bond sexually with me today. That is what Google told me. I'm not sure of its gender.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
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