She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
I need a burrito and a hug.
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
Randomize
