Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
Verdict: uncircumcised.
Randomize
