I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
Randomize
