no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
Randomize
