I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
You know why nobody comes up with Sober October? Other than it's Oktoberfest? Because Sober October doesn't benefit anyone, just like your judgment isn't benefiting me. I'll talk to you in November. Unless you make up another alcoholless month.
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy�
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
Randomize
