dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
Randomize
