Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
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