first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
Changed all my ex bf's names to "no" in my phone so the next time I try to drunk text one of them it'll basically be like Russian roulette
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
Randomize
