Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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