Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
It came up in court that I told the arresting officer my name was Thomas Jefferson, and I was born in 1776. I almost kept a straight face. Almost.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
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