she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
how does that bad decision feel?
Randomize
