What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Randomize
