didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
Randomize
