This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
Randomize
