Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
Randomize
