real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
I just chugged a whole pitcher of beer in 1 min. 9 sec. A whole goddamn pitcher.
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
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