bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
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