Pappa wants mamma naked
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
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