I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
Randomize
