I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
Randomize
