I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
Randomize
