drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Randomize