dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
Drunk is a universal language darling
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