we have officially lost it.
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
I woke up to the sound of gentle rain, only to realize I was laying under a urine trough in the men's restroom. Fuck you, bourbon. Fuck you.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
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