I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
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