Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
Hey, it was your idea to keep her occupied with the barscanner on your phone.
you didnt need to give her a fucking sharpie. there are handmade barcodes everywhere. including my cock. fucker.
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical�
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
jump out the window naked night went bad
Randomize
