i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Randomize
