I never want to see another naked old woman again.
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
Randomize
