so that wasnt chicken after all
And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
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