Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
Randomize
