i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
Someone signed my nipple.
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